Happy Tuesday and back to school!
The daycare drop off always seems a
little tougher after a long weekend --probably because the weekend full of
snuggles, and squeaky laughs and sweet sleepy babies makes it that much
harder to be away.
Today was one of those tough days.
Where I want to bundle him back up in his carseat, grab a latte, and
head home to do nothing but enjoy his "baby-ness", all day long. There
was a mom dropping her little one off for the first time this morning. I
saw her tears and felt my own eyes welling up a bit.
So,
inspired by this morning's events, here are some helpful tips (at least
we found them helpful!) for wrapping up maternity leave and getting
ready to go back to work.
First, don't think about
maternity leave ending, or going back to work, until you have to. I've
had "friends" start panicking about going back to work, and their child
is only a few days, or a few weeks old (and by friends, I am clearly
referencing myself). C is my first baby, and during the first few weeks I
would gaze down at him, and then start to wonder how I would ever be
able to leave him, and then I would SOB. Uncontrollably, S.O.B.
Fortunately, and with the help of a very intuitive hubby, I realized
that if I spent all of my maternity leave worrying about going back to
work, I wouldn't fully enjoy my time off with my little guy. So when
those thoughts of having to go back started to creep in, I worked
(really hard) to remind myself that I could worry about that later, and
to enjoy the sweet buns-up kneeling munchkin napping on my chest. It
actually worked! After a day or two, I barely thought about going back
and it remained that way until the last week of my leave. My heightened
awareness helped me to really stay in the moment and savor every little
last snuggle.
Based on my own experience, here are some helpful tips:
1.
Don't think about going back until you have to.
2.
Go back on a Wednesday or Thursday.
(Nat
shared this one with me and if you can't do anything else - do this
one! Going back for a 3 day week definitely helped me ease back into
things, figure out our routine, and not panic about having enough milk
stored up)
3.
Have family or close friends babysit the first week.
Starting a new child care routine, leaving your little one for likely
the lengthiest time yet, AND getting back into the groove at work is a
LOT of change for one week. If a parent, sibling, or friend can watch
the baby that first week it will be one less worry on your mind. My
sister stayed with us during my first week back and it was comforting to
know he was having fun with his auntie while I was away. Coming home to
folded laundry and dinner in the oven was an added bonus!
4
. Let yourself grieve your maternity leave. Cry, complain, sob...do what you need to. It is HARD to go back. Period.
5.
Develop your own mantra.
As many mamas do, I felt guilty that I was not staying home full-time.
To battle this guilt, I reminded myself of the benefits of work and
daycare (yes, there are some!). My internal monologue usually went
something like this, "He's building a great immune system...He's
socializing and learning...Our time together is truly quality time and
appreciated now...We can save for college...We can go on
Vacation....etc, etc."
(Erin again...I use my
'driving to work' time as a time to collect my thoughts, get ready for
work and think about work stuff in general. Then, on the way home, it's
all baby time...that and getting ready for dinner. This has been a
huge help. My first few 25 minute drives to work were horrible...way
too long to think about being away from my baby)
6.
Call daycare. Check
in. See how things are going. Trust us, they're used to hearing from
mommas on their first week back to work. They'll be happy to fill you
in. And it might just make you feel better to know that everything is
going well.
I promise, it gets
easier, although (only 5 months back) I am hesitant to say it will ever get
easy.
While there are some (most!) days that I LOVE my job and am happy to be
a working mama, there are also some days where it is a struggle to
leave him in the morning, and I drive to work with wet eyes.
What are your tips for going back to work post-maternity leave?